CHAPTER TWENTY
Beth couldn’t get Lou out of her mind. Like a seed, once planted her feelings started to grow as thoughts of Lou dominated her. She knew they had made a tremendous connection, not just on a physical level but also a spiritual one too. She needed to know how Lou felt. But was she being silly? Unsophisticated? She didn’t think so. As soon as she arrived home she looked in her bag for Lou’s number. It wasn’t there.
Frantically she tipped everything out, scattering the entire contents over the living room floor. She knew exactly where she had put it. Sickened, it dawned on her that H must have searched her bag and destroyed it.
‘How dare she?’ Beth shouted into her handbag as she pulled it inside out tearing the lining. ‘The bitch. The fucking bitch. Just wait till I see her!’ Fury flooded Beth. ‘Now I’ll have to wait for Lou to contact me.’ She flung her handbag onto the floor.
Marching over to her drinks cabinet, she splashed whisky into a crystal tumbler. Snatching up the glass she went to stare into the large mirror above the fireplace. Her anger was so great that she could see nothing but blackness. And Hyacinth’s face. In her head she could hear Hyacinth’s voice. ‘I will make you want only me.’
Beth spun round, violently shaking her head, spilling the whisky on the carpet. Her room was as it should be. She turned back. The mirror now reflected her, and her surroundings. She was suddenly deathly tired and took sanctuary in her bed. She stayed there all day, only getting up to visit the bathroom. She felt ill. On Tuesday she rang into work pleading sickness, then unplugged the phone and switched off her mobile. She needed isolation, to be able to go within herself and look for answers.
On Wednesday morning Beth was working alongside George Dickinson.
‘Feeling better today, Beth?’ George enquired pleasantly while they prepared to scrub up.
‘Yes. Thank you for asking. It was nothing really, but I could not risk coming into work.’
‘Understood.’ George moved the taps into the on position with his elbows and began to scrub under the running water. ‘How did you enjoy your weekend away with my wife?’
Suddenly there was a silence. Everyone’s ears pricked, waiting for Beth’s answer.
Beth smiled thinly, ‘We had a pleasant enough time.’
She dried her hands, tossed the towel into the bin, then held her hands up for the nurse to help with her surgical gloves.
All the while George whistled tunelessly. Then he stopped, glanced over his shoulder, his hands still under the running water, and said, ‘I haven’t seen her since she got back. She went straight to Carlisle. Has she been in touch with you?’
Beth pretended not to hear. She walked off pushing the operating theatre doors open with her hip.